Wednesday, July 17, 2013

I am Geneva

Over the past two years I have poured my heart and soul into this blog. I have shared with you all my innermost desires, fears, beliefs and doubts but I don't think I have shared enough about who I am.

I am Geneva May Atwood.

I love life and everything about it. I love and am loved.

Life is an adventure that I face with a smile that is usually accompanied with a sarcastic quip. The smile I get from my Mom and the sarcasm I get from my Dad. Combined, these attributes formulate in to one really lovable personality. Often, I can give the impression that life has me down, or that the struggles I pass through are too tough for me but in reality, there is nothing big enough to ever keep me down. I have three very active kids who seem to challenge my patience at every opportunity and I will admit that sometimes they  win little battles and I loose my cool (who hasn't?), BUT, they have never ever felt anything but love from me.

I was fairly young by today's standards when I got married and had kids (21 and 24 respectively). I fell in love with a young man named Ken and he fell for me also. He knew very early on in our dating life that I was the one for him. We were like two peas in a pod as far as our whit, sarcasm and love of life. We were married after only 6 months of dating and are coming up on 12 years of marriage. Ken knows that he is really lucky to have me, even though he doesn't say it as often as he could. Ken and I have remained best friends through our entire marriage (fights and all) and there is nothing that we wouldn't do for each other.

I remember when we were new parents living in a home we had just purchased and we became quite concerned about what we would do in the event of a fire, especially if the other person was unconscious. So we spend the rest of the evening practicing dragging the other's limp body down the hall and out the front door. This is one of Ken's favorite memories.

Another story that always brings a smile to his face is when we were debating whose head was bigger. I remember telling him that my head was huge and ugly and he would argue that it wasn't. So to settle the matter we took turns weighing our heads on the bathroom scale. We had to do it several times to make sure the reading was accurate. It turns out that Ken was right and my head wasn't as large as I thought.

As most of you know I was in the hospital for the past while but through the grace of God, I am back home now. It is so nice to finally not have that aching back anymore. My only complaint is that there are so many friends and family waiting to say hello that it is hard to find time to update this blog.

So what can I tell you since I last updated you all? Well Disney Land was an experience of a lifetime. I am so glad I had the chance to go there with my kids. I want thank everyone who was part of helping us get there, but most especially Riley, his family and my dear sister Amanda for setting up the fund. I can’t forget my awesome friends in Trail who sacrificed their long beautiful hair to raise money for my family. (Ken is really thankful too even though he is proud and has a hard time accepting charity…It really touched his heart)

So now that I am home everything seems to be at peace. My hair is finally growing back, the scare on my head is gone now and oh yes, and my beloved boob is back. I am cancer free and feeling great.  
I also have a clarity that is almost impossible to describe. I don’t know how to put it to words but I wish you could all see how unimportant so much of our lives are. For those who are struggling with feelings of inadequacy or guilt from sin, LIGHTEN UP!!!, nobody here cares what you have done and if there is one message they could give, it is that it isn't as hard as you think to get here. Life is simply a test at the end of a course; I mean you've already made it through the whole semester, now it is simply a multiple choice exam at the end. And… it’s open book for crying out loud so you can go back and change the answers you may have gotten wrong. Do me a favor and give yourselves a break and don’t sweat the small stuff. And if that wasn't easy enough, you can simply ask the “Teacher” for the answer if you don’t know it.

If there is one thing I have learned through all of this is that he lives and there is a real plan for us. I did not understand his plan for me during life but I do now. Everything makes sense finally and I see how my short earthly life was an important part of things to come for my family. I know they don’t see it right now but I promise that it will all make sense one day. Trust me!

I also want to thank every person who was praying for me. Although the outcome wasn’t what you all desired, I want you to all know that your prayers were answered. It broke Heavenly Father’s heart to not keep me on earth but I can promise you, it was the right thing to do. I can’t ruin the surprise but you will just have to wait and see all the great things that are going to happen. Besides, it’s not like I won’t be around or anything, I still plan on visiting all the time.

I met my grandmother for the first time today and I couldn’t believe my eyes when I found out that she was a “Dog the Bounty Hunter” junkie too. So to my mother I say, “Don’t let anyone make you feel silly for your “Dog” habits.

I also have a few more shout outs to make (sorry I can’t give one to all of you but I’ll make it up to you by the end of this blog). I would like to let Mike know that I found his arm and leg here and they are pretty cool, although they are somewhat disappointed at how well you are doing without them. I’ll keep them clean for you while they wait.

To Dale F, I want to caution not to judge Mormons so harshly because you would be surprised at how many of your relatives here are members. They are however very proud of the great job you are doing with their great great grandchildren.

To my friends, I want to ask to feed my husband lots so he stays fat and un-datable (but don’t tell him I said that)

Okay, that’s enough shout-outs for one blog.

This last while in the hospital has been a great experience for me. I have been able to come and visit so many of you while my body rested in bed. Even if you didn't notice me, I have been to see you and I can prove it. If at any time during this blog you have found yourself smiling,,,,,, that was me saying hello........ If you haven’t smiled, well I guess we weren't that close and too bad for you.

So as I conclude my tale of “My Unexpected Path” I say farewell to you all and thank you from the bottom of my heart for your love. I must be going as its movie night and apparently we get to watch a real scene from any time in Earth’s history. While that sounds cool and all, I hope they have Django cuz I freaking love that bag scene.

Bye for now,



  1. Love you G! We'll help take care of Ken and the Kidlens. Thanks for helping us to "always look on the bright side of life".

  2. My heart is breaking but I'm still able to laugh and cry while reading this.

  3. I have admired your beauty and strength through your battle with cancer. I hope you enjoy soaring above all you friends and family and keep on sending those rainbows to us.

  4. Rest well Auntie V. We will see you again. Please watch over us. <3 Hugs-a-bugs! <3, Loves, Sagers and Silvers.

  5. Ah Geneva....only you could write such a beautiful, funny and sad blog. I'm crying and laughing...all at once. Rest in peace dear heart. You are so loved.
    With love and many prayers
    Kathie Douglas

  6. It breaks my heart to read this but find hope and inspiration in your words. The world was a better place when you were with us and will continue to be while you watch over us! You were always loved by so many and your legacy will live on through the hearts you have touched. Rest in Peace!
    Tarin Boucher

  7. I may have not known you outside of work but I"m happy to have met you and able to help you when you needed it. You are one of the strongest and funniest people I have met...

  8. Wow what a blog. I didn't know you or your family, but I saw a post on my friend's facebook page and it lead me to read this blog. I've got tears in my eyes at how eloquently you have written this. It really puts into perspective what really matters in life, so I thank you for sharing this. God be with your family and friends.

  9. You are such an inspiration to so many. So many are so lucky to have had you in their lives. I only wish I had known you better. You come from a very special family and You will live on through them. God Bless you and your family.

  10. My heart breaks for you and your family. They were so lucky to have had such a wonderful mother, wife, friend and relative. Your story is truly inspirational. May you rest in peace.

  11. Heidi & Scott & their family prayed for you often. They will watch out for your family. Harper, especially, will watch out for your son. I don't know you, Geneva, but I know they love you. Peace.

  12. The strength you have shown through all this is amazing. You truly are an amazing human being. I will always remember your smiling face, especially in the sexy McDonald's uniform. Much love to you and your family

  13. Geneva I did not know you or your family; I followed a link from a friend's Facebook page and found your blog. What you have done here is simply beautiful. I have no doubt that the family, and the legacy, you are leaving here on earth are equally beautiful. Thank you for sharing these experiences, and Godspeed.

  14. I also did not know Geneva and only saw a post on a friend's FB page. Reading the end of the blog gave me shivers as my own mother passed away four years ago today (July 18, 2009) and several family members have shared stories about talking with or seeing my Mom so I know she is still watching over us. Bless you and your family.

  15. rest in peace, you were such a wonderful person. you have touched so many hearts and i cant wait to see you. <3 love zoe

  16. Rest in peace Geneva. It has been years since I have seen you but I remember how full of life you were and your sense of humor. You always made everyone smile. I read your blog all the time and you are a strong woman. Even though it has been years since I have seen you, you have touch me. I pray for your family may the lord be with them in this hard time. But knowing they have a beautiful angel watching over them is a wonderful.

  17. Geneva and Ken
    I am so very sorry that this dear little sister has been taken in the prime of her life as she was such a blessing to all who know her.
    She has so much to live for and to give to her lovely little family.
    When I consider God's plan for us all, it sometimes makes me want to cry just to think that here am I, am old man with most of my life behind me. My children are raised and some of my grandchildren are too but I don't have a thing wrong with me, then there is you- your life was just getting started, your children need you for your love and guidance. Your husband needs you too for the companionship that you had planned together.
    If it were possible to make a switch, I would ask God to give you whatever life I have left on His books and let me go to the spirit world in your place.
    Unfortunately, those kinds of trades are not done and we just have to hang in there through such a tragic loss that has happened to you.
    Our prayers are with the survivors of course and thank you for your bright and cheerful contribution to my life.
    I will miss Geneva, she is a sweetheart.

  18. Geneva and Ken - I haven't seen you since I did the flowers and decorations for your wedding, but your Mom has kept me uptodate. I loved your blog, Geneva, you have inspired so many people. I made me smile and feel sad at the same time. My sister recently passed away and before she went she was looking forward to a great adventure. I feel her watching over us, and I know your family will continue to feel and treasure your love as you watch over them. My love and prayers have been with you and your family. You will be the most beautiful angel. Love always - Jo Bailey

  19. In our short intense time together, I would be negligent to not declare that Momma Linda passed along the genes of strength, integrity, love and the truth to our beautiful Angel Geneva. Along with the always amazing sense of humor came a profound sense of knowing that Life itself is a plan. I am so honored to have experienced the time with you and Momma, but more importantly, the lessons you have left with me.
    Fly high, Beautiful Girl!!

  20. I found this blog through a fb friend. It was so interesting and well written that I had to go right back to the beginning and read the whole thing. I think Ken should make a book out of it. Geneva - you were an amazing woman. You put a human face on that dreadful disease and did so with charm, wit, humour and realism. Even though I never met you I will miss reading your blog. I pray that Ken and your children will feel the love of God close around them and know you are safe in his arms. You are dearly loved by people you never even met.

  21. I too came across this blog on a friends facebook post. I scrolled to the beginning of your blog and have continued to be absolutely amazed at the strenth you have faced this trial with. I dont think many people could do that. what an true inspiration you are for people and we pray your family will be blessed with peace through this.

  22. You are such an inspiration. I am blessed to have met you and your beautiful family. I am grateful for our daughters meeting and being such wonderful friends. Thank you for showing and reminding me to love that much more and to cherish all that life gives me. Life is truly beautiful. You give us all strength. "She is like the wind, you cannot see her, but you will always feel her"

  23. After reading your entire blog, I am amazed by you. Your spirit of candor,authenticity, and love of your family is beyond inspirational. The gift of YOU is immeasurable :)

  24. I miss you G. I miss our jogs together and I miss being neighbors, I miss hearing your voice on the phone. I miss our crys and I miss our laughs. I know we will see you again and I am so grateful you are at peace and happy. Love, A.

  25. i miss you everyday,think and cry everyday. i hope your family is coping well. i just cant understand all of this yet!

  26. Rest in Paradise sweet angel. You will always be loved.