Sunday, June 17, 2012

The roller coaster of all roller coasters.

Today started off great.  My infusion went well.  It is always a pleasure to be with those that are going through the same trials.  We lighten one anothers loads... but not quite like our Savior.
I think at times I dont’ give Him enough credit.  I KNOW he suffered every single pain, heartache, emotion, burden etc. that I feel.  He knows exactly how I feel.  He suffered for me.  He suffered not only for the mistakes I made, but I think most importantly for the heartaches I would feel in my journey in my life.  That is a huge comfort to know I am not alone.  I literally feel Him lift me when I can no longer go any further.  He is by my side.  He is cheering me on.  He is on my team.  He loves me.
Maybe you think I am currently in a delusional state.  I am not. 
I spoke with Dr. Foresyth today... I love that man.  He is amazing!  I haven’t been feeling all that great and so we chatted about healing reactions.  Like he said “With homeopathy, it usually gets worse before it gets better.”  I think that is my current state.  For once the nausea isn’t bothering me, but I am very emotional – bawling like a baby, my body aches, and I currently in the camper while it is 35+ outside, in my jammies, under the blankets.  I have a fever and then I get hot, you all know the feeling of a  fever.   It is part and parcel of my body healing, but let me tell you, it is hard to go through.
Like I have posted before, I thought this would be easy and in the grand scheme of things it is, but in these moments... it is so hard.
Thank you for letting me get my feelings off my heavy chest.  Thank you for letting me talk.  Thank you for being non-judgemental and completely supportive.  Like we have said many, many times WE COULD NEVER DO THIS WITHOUT YOU!  YOU are also a blessing in our lives and we pray for you and your families every night (blanketly, but still, our Heavenly Father knows who you are and that you pray for us) and thank Him for your prayers and love.  We hope that your prayers are answered just as ours are.  We pray that you have peace and clarity amidst your challenges, and we pray that you know he is there for you, just like he is for me, to help you and heal you.

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