Tuesday, May 10, 2011

"Mommy, when is your hair going to fall out?"

A question that the kids, especially K has asked me quite often. I guess she is excited that it will be coming out?? I am not sure. I honestly think she will cry when she see's me do it. I am sure I will too, so we can hug each other and give it our all! ;) I am thankful for the shoulder's I can cry on, although I don't feel the need to really cry a lot right now. Like I said, I am sure that chemo is going to be the tough one for me, but I still feel strong.


So back to the hair. I am sad that I am going to loose it. At the same time I just want to cut it and get it over with. I feel like I have been waiting forever for it to happen even though I haven't started any treatments or anything, but just the wait is crappy. Knowing that it is coming... but who knows when. Three weeks? Six weeks? I don't want to cut it too early, but I don't want to wait until it is falling out in huge long clumps.


It is truly one of the only things that makes me feel beautiful and I don't know what I will be able to hide behind when it is gone. Nothing. I will just be out there. Hope my wig comes in soon!! ;)


I used to hate getting ready and doing my hair just because it takes forever. BUT I love having long hair. It has taken me 4 years to grow it out to this stage. I am sad it is going to take that long to do it again!! I guess I can make a goal that by the time I will hopefully be 5 years cancer free, I will have my locks again! That is something to look forward too!

3 comments:

  1. You absolutely do NOT have to hide behind your hair!! It's not what makes you beautiful!! You are beautiful inside and out!! Thought I would let you know that I've heard from people who have lost their hair to chemo that it comes in soft and beautiful when it grows back!! I love the "cancer free for 5 years" statement. Definitely something to look forward to!! Sending love to help you get through your first treatment on Thursday!!
    Lots of Love, Linda xoxoxo <3

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  2. I totally agree with Linda, you are beautiful inside and out, and definitely don't need to "hide" behind your hair! But I can also imagine how sad you are that you may lose it....... But you will still be beautiful :-)
    Good luck tomorrow, I will be thinking about you!
    Hugs,
    Allison

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  3. My thoughts and prayers are with you tomorrow and always. Good luck.

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